“Police in the Community” — Gather every mom of a black boy you know. It’s time for another Talk on our next episode of “The New Talk: For Moms of Black Boys”
January 2nd at 7 pm ET / 6 pm CT we talk with Kim Varner Sr. a 26-year retired veteran of the Jacksonville Sheriff's Office who lost his son to violence, shares profound insights on "Police in the Community: Truly Being a Part of the People." As the Senior Instructor and Director of Programs for Dedication to Community, a national nonprofit fostering healing and unity, his perspective is both eye-opening and motivational.
Read moreFeaturing SONshine, Christopher Smith & his incredible mom, Regenna Grier. Christopher shares how he was wrongfully convicted of two armed robberies, was held on a million dollar bail, and spent thirteen years of his life trying to reclaim his name, freedom, and realize his dream of becoming a fire fighter. His mother Regenna, a DC police officer was forced to live her worst nightmare and was torn between her life's work and protecting her son.
Watch this episode:
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July 7, 2016
I am starting this group today because I don't know what else to do. I am upset and in tears and living fear every day for my sons who are only seven and four. I cry on every one of their birthdays because I know that each year that they grow, they will be viewed as less innocent and more of a threat to society. This is not normal or fair. I am hoping that we can create a support system for each other -- If nothing else to have a private place to vent --or possibly to evolve into an education and advocacy group. For now, I just need the love and support for my sisters who may be feeling the same way :-( Thank you for joining.
Original Facebook Group post:
Depelsha McGruder is Founder and Board Chair of Moms of Black Boys United, Inc. (MOBB United) and M.O.B.B. United for Social Change, Inc. (MUSC). She is a distinguished leader committed to reshaping societal perceptions and policies impacting Black boys and men. Currently serving as the Chief Operating Officer & Treasurer at the Ford Foundation, Depelsha oversees global finance and operations for 11 offices across the US, Africa, Asia, and Latin America.
In 2016 I found myself fighting alone. My son was nine years old and facing health challenges when he had his first police contact in his elementary school. I felt helpless as I saw the fear in my son's eyes. In his life there was so much I could not control, and now I could not control how the school was hurting him. I was in the middle of fighting, trying to preserve the hope in my son's eyes, the joy he once had when I was added to a group of women who were screaming the same thing. MOBB United gave me a place to turn my outrage into action and I felt less alone.
I have watched this world incrementally dim the light from my son's eyes. Trying to restore the glow and remind him of his greatness is why I am still here.
My two sons deserve to thrive, receive grace, love, peace, joy, and to have a future free of harm!
MOBB United is dedicated to eliminating the racial disparity that puts our Black sons at a disadvantage in the areas of education and the criminal justice system. To do this, we promote changing negative perceptions and increasing awareness and understanding of the plight of Black boys and men in America. We enable Moms of Black sons to tell their stories, celebrate their accomplishments, and connect them to opportunities that enrich the lives of their sons.
Moms of Black Boys United, Inc. initiatives are designed to:
In December 2023, M.O.B.B. United debuted our podcast The NEW Talk: For Moms of Black Boys. We are changing the way we talk to our sons; why we talk to our sons; and how we talk about our sons! Our SonShines deserve to grow up without the constant exposure to trauma, especially at home. We are having the broader conversations around life and the liberties all of our families deserve.
If you are the parent of a Black boy, you know what THE TALK is. You also know what it feels like to see the innocence of childhood dimmed in the eyes of your SonShine, as you have that talk. But that is not all we are talking about! THE NEW TALK is educating, enlightening, and sharing information to bridge the gap between all communities.
THE NEW TALK is for every member of the family as we are stronger together. The way we strengthen community is to join community in the solutions.
Tune in on the M.O.B.B. United LinkedIn, Facebook, Spotify, or YouTube pages to see previously aired episodes and catch all of our new content!
Our democratic process depends on us! The memoir of America tells the tale of how we had to fight for our right to vote, to exercise our right to vote, and all the ways this country has attempted to strip us of our right to vote. M.O.B.B. United knows all the reasons to be discouraged about participating in the voting process, but we must!
Le^el Up The V*te, MOBB United's voter education campaign is geared towards providing the educational resources needed to make an informed decision at the ballot box. The Le^el Up The V*te campaign will focus on all levels of the election process and how they impact our community directly. We need to be involved in state, city, and county elections if we want to affect change for our SonShines.
Let's Le^el Up The V*te today!
The #ProtectEm campaign, initially launched as the #ProtectThem campaign, was one of the first actions taken by the organization in 2016, born of the frustration and urgent cries of Moms everywhere who were afraid for their son's safety in the hands of law enforcement. The country was still reeling from the collective trauma of witnessing online the brutal treatment of Alton Sterling and Philando Castile, followed by countless others. This social media imagery campaign quickly became a key initiative and cornerstone of the MOBB United mission.The intent is to flood the internet with positive images of Black boys and men; to soften them visually and underscore the reality that Black boys are not a monolith. We want to change the unfair narrative that our boys and men are inherently violent and lack boundaries. Our Black boys have to navigate life in the face of a world that devalues them; they work hard in school, play sports, have friends of all races, and have goals to become high school and college graduates and live productive lives. We want the world to see them the way their Mothers see them from birth - a precious life that deserves love and protection from harm.Since the inception of this campaign, we have used this ideology and hashtag across all our platforms to drive this message out to the masses in hopes that it will accomplish the very thing that MOBB United was founded upon; to change the perception of young Black males in society.
Check out this #Protectem video!
Half of the 250 Kids Expelled from Preschool Each Day Are Black Boys.
From the moment a Black boy is born, he enters a pipeline with a predetermined trajectory that often ends with being incarcerated. The School to Prison Pipeline is a real thing and it starts with a lack of GRACE for the SonShines we raise. History says making mistakes as a Black boy or man can be catastrophic at almost any age.
M.O.B.B. United is tired of telling the story that ends with the disproportionate suspension, expulsion, and incarceration of our sons. ALL of our SonShines deserve GRACE, UNDERSTANDING, & LOVE. They deserve the opportunity to grow from mistakes rather than receive the harsh punishments the currently receive.
The GRACE Campaign is M.O.B.B. United's newest Changing Perceptions initiative. We will be telling the stories of redemption and personal growth, despite the struggles our SonShines may have experienced. We want to demonstrate how providing support, love, compassion, and understanding while redirecting negative behavior can lead to outcomes that keep our SonShines at home, rather than the penal system. Our children can succeed and M.O.B.B. United wants to extend the GRACE they need to do so!
Each pillar demonstrates how MOBB United is working to bring our ultimate goal to fruition— a society where our SonShines are seen for the intelligent, innovative, loving, people they are!
Change Perceptions – Promoting positive imagery and providing opportunities for Black men and Boys to be seen as productive, contributing, values members of our society.
Influence Policy - Utilizing our collective voice in support of policies that protect Black men and boys and create and/or safeguard the basic freedoms all of our SonShines are entitled to.
Demonstrate our Power – Leveraging our resources, and vote as a means to illustrate the power we have as a people.
Partner Strategically – Partnering with like-minded organizations whose mission and purpose aligns with ours.
Promote Self-Care - Because we know this is a marathon not a sprint, we encourage and provide ways to preserve and replenish our fuel for the fight, centralizing on spirituality, mindfulness, and healthy self-care practices.
Like all moms, we want our SonShines to have a chance to live, learn, and leave their legacies. United, we will protect their right to do so and help them to not just survive but thrive.
Moms of Black Boys (MOBB) United, Inc. and MOBB United for Social Change, Inc. (MUSC) are sister organizations that are dedicated to positively influencing how Black boys and men are perceived and treated by law enforcement and in society. MOBB United is a nationwide coalition of concerned moms of Black sons who represent every race, age, socioeconomic background, marital status and education level. What we share is unconditional love for our Black sons, and we want others to see them through our proud eyes.
As moms, we have seen our sons enter the world innocently, take first steps, learn about love, pursue hopes and dreams, and experience disappointments and pain. Like all moms, we want our SUNS to have a chance to live, learn, and leave their legacies. United, we will protect their rights to do so and help them to survive and thrive.
I am the mother of two Black sons. I started MOBB United as a friendly Facebook support group in July 2016. Since then, the movement has grown tremendously, giving birth to a national crusade that has instilled hope, empowerment, and an unwavering commitment to take action.
Moms of Black Boys United, Inc. provides information and support for moms of Black sons and promotes positive images of Black boys and men. The organization is dedicated to changing perceptions, encouraging self-care, and fostering understanding of the plight of Black boys and men in America by telling their stories, celebrating their accomplishments, and connecting them to opportunities. The group supports moms by encouraging strong family and community connections and sharing information that empowers them to navigate all of the institutions that interact with, influence, and impact our sons.
MOBB United for Social Change, Inc. (MUSC) is the advocacy arm and sister organization of Moms of Black Boys United, Inc. Its goal is to influence policy at the federal, state, and local levels to ensure that Black boys and men are treated fairly and equitably. MUSC is focused on eradicating harassment, brutality, and unwarranted use of deadly force by law enforcement. We want our sons and law enforcement officers to make it home safely every night.
MOBB United applies a multi-pronged approach that includes media campaigns and storytelling, education and engagement, political and economic empowerment, self-care, strategic partnerships and sustained advocacy and community involvement.
Edition 7 April 2018 | ||
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Founder's Corner: Our
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Policy and Advocacy Committee ProgressThe Policy and Advocacy Committee finalized and recently launched a new advocacy resource, the organization’s Legislative Policy Platform. The Legislative Platform outlines MOBB United for Social Change’s policy priorities and equips members to be informed about... |
MUSC Calls for Transparent and Expeditious Investigation into the Death of 22-Year-Old Stephon ClarkOn Sunday night, Stephon Clark was doing the same thing that many of us do regularly — he simply walked around the outside of his home with his cell phone in his hand. That night, Stephon was killed in the... |
Parkland ReflectionsOn February 14th of this year, a young man armed with an AR-15 rifle entered his former high school, killed 17 people—mostly students—and injured 15. This was, by no means, the first school shooting we’ve seen; in fact, there have been at least 17 school shootings to date in 2018 alone. In part because of its... |
Donovan’s Story: 14-Year-Old Father of Twins Defying the OddsMichelle Carter’s voice fills with pride when she talks about her 15 year-old son, Donovan. “He’s incredibly mature and responsible. He doesn’t see himself as doing something remarkable—to him, he’s just doing what he’s supposed to do,” said the proud mom, who is a member of the Moms of Black Boys United, Inc. Private Facebook group. Donovan is the father of twin toddler girls, named... |
Passover to FreedomGo Down, Moses” is commonly known as a “Negro Spiritual”, although it may have earlier origins as a rallying song for escaped slaves who joined Union forces in the Civil War. It is also reported to be a code song for slaves traveling the Underground Railroad out of Maryland. If you are familiar with this song, you may know... |
Brothers!Brothers are the best brothers! They are nurturing, protective, loving and fun! Here is some inspiration from an abolitionist poem: "Am I not a man and brother; Ought I not, then, to be free?" Enjoy these awesome photos... |
Special Needs Committee Update: Autism Awareness MonthApril is Autism Awareness Month. MOBB United has encouraged moms to be aware of these themes and participate in the following and activities... |
Education and Engagement Committee UpdateHello, Moms of Black Boys United beauties! Happy April! Spring is finally here |
Gifted Learners: Advocating for Screening and Referrals for Children of ColorMy son, Ezekiel, is never without a book in hand and a backpack full of reading on-the-go. As the youngest of five, he probably got read aloud to a little longer and a little more often than his siblings, with me not quite ready to let go of that sweet stage of snuggles and bedtime stories. So, it was no surprise... |
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*Special thanks to C.K. LeDaniel, Rebecca Palermo, and Vivian Nwankpah, Beth Lunde, and Theresa Cunningham, for their contributions in the preparation of the newsletter.* |
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Prior Editions - Feb 2018, Dec 2017, Oct 2017, Sept 2017, Aug 2017, June 2017 | ||||||
Edition 6 February 2018 | ||
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THE FOUNDER'S CORNER |
MOBB United: Striving to Become Experts in the Black Male ExperienceThis month, I have been heavily reminded of the reason MOBB United exists. As you probably know, the organization started following multiple police killings of unarmed Black boys and men that were unjustified, but were not punished under the law. Although our mission started in response to police brutality and unwarranted use of deadly force by law enforcement, it doesn’t end there. This is because police brutality that leads to... |
Policy and Advocacy Committee ProgressIt’s a new year for MOBB United for Social Change’s Policy and Advocacy committee, and we will soon be rolling out our Legislative Platform. A new resource, the Legislative Platform will equip members to be informed about our policy priorities when they engage with partners and policy makers across the country. We will launch... |
MUSC Call Center UpdateWe stand on the shoulders of our ancestors, moms who were on the frontlines of past Civil Rights movements and moms who resisted the status quo. We organize in the spirit of our righteous mentor, Fannie Lou Hamer, who infamously stated, "I am tired of being sick and tired.” We activate the principles of MOBB United for Social Change, Inc. (MUSC), which include showing our... |
MOBB United at San Diego Women's MarchOn January 20th, thousands of women descended on Waterfront Park for the Women's March in San Diego, CA, to demonstrate their unity and be voices for those in need of support. MOBB United's Communications Committee Chair Vanessa McCullers gave a powerful and passionate speech on behalf of the sister organizations... |
Black Maternal Trauma
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MUSC Official Statement on H&MPerception. It’s what differentiates ugly from beautiful, good from bad. For many, it relates specifically to how they view things, but for Black and brown boys and men and their moms who love them, it’s almost always connected to how our sons are viewed by society and those in authority. For centuries, Black people have been the object of... |
Facebook Re-Post: CauseThe following posts were shared originally in the Moms of Black Boys United, Inc. private Facebook group: H&M Op-Ed “No Monkeys Here” by Vanessa McCullers Picked up by Blavity and TVOne Screening and Panel with Eric Garner's Mom... |
Kneeling for JusticeWith Super Bowl LII just concluding with a Philadelphia Eagles victory over the New England Patriots, one has to wonder what happened to the Black Community and its allies taking a knee for justice? Just the other day, I was on Facebook, and my timeline was flooded with posts about how the Patriots were going to beat the Eagles in the big game. People of color were paying homage to Tom Brady and his athletic ability and his winning record. I was mortified... |
Gifted Sons Photo FeatureOur princes are gifted and talented! Members of the Moms of Black Boys United, Inc. private Facebook group share photos with us so we can share their joy and pride with you. Enjoy this gifted sons photo feature! |
Aspiring with Asperger's: A Black Son's Journey into Professional Video GamingMoms, if your 18-year-old Black son came to you and said, “I want to be a professional video gamer,” what would your reaction be? Close your eyes for 5 seconds, and imagine that scenario. If you put yourself in Aundrea Caldwell’s shoes, you might think, ‘WHAT THE...?! Boy bye!’ or something like that. But, there’s a twist here. What if your son also has... |
Mentoring Matters: Three Families’ Stories of Personal, Academic, and Professional GrowthEncouraging our Black sons to shine is incredibly important to many members of the Moms of Black Boys United, Inc. Facebook group. We hear countless stories of young Black boys and men defining their ambitions, chasing their dreams, and exceeding their goals. In many of our sons’ lives, mentors play a positive and impactful role, inspiring their mentees to carve out a future that is fulfilling and allows them to make their mark on the world... |
Facebook Re-Post: Black Son Speaks out against Racial ProfilingNot everyone understands the plight of Black boys and men in America, much less the plight of moms of Black boys, but it's nice to know that our sons themselves do understand. Mom Desiree Robinson is happy to share her 15 year old's perspective... |
Education and Engagement Committee UpdateHappy February, beauties! The Education and Engagement Committee has started reading another book, Between The World and Me, by Ta-Nehisi Coates. We have had three posts so far this month. If you haven’t already, hopefully you will begin reading the book with us and join in the discussion on Facebook by searching... |
MOBB United Connections: Auntie Teri SilarOne of the initiatives of the MOBB United Connections Committee is the Aunties Program. The Aunties Program connects sons who are away from home at school, work, or in the military, with moms across the country. This program provides a village for our sons that ensures that they have their basic needs met, provides them with support from an adult who is nearby, and reassures their moms that their sons are doing well while away... |
MOBB UNITED NEEDS YOU: Become a Volunteer Today!Volunteer Shout Out:
Where does she get the energy?! Vanessa McCullers has been going all out for MOBB United since July 2016, and she seems to be as fully charged as the Energizer Bunny. We know her passion is fueled by her love for her SONshine, Carlos. If you’re wondering what Vanessa does for MOBB United, the answer is well...everything!!! Vanessa initially began as Co-Chair of...
She says, "The morning after Alton Sterling was killed, I went to wake my son for work and found him sitting up in bed. His first words to me was "Mom did you see how they just killed that man" I was too stunned to respond. The very next morning we found out that Philando Castile was killed. No words needed to be said. The words were on my son's face. He was scared, and so was I. But as his mother..." |
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*Special thanks to C.K. LeDaniel, Rebecca Palermo, and Vivian Nwankpah, Beth Lunde, and Theresa Cunningham, for their contributions in the preparation of the newsletter.* |
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Prior Editions - Dec 2017, Oct 2017, Sept 2017, Aug 2017, June 2017 | ||||||
Edition 5 December 2017 | ||
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THE FOUNDER'S CORNER |
Volunteer: MOBB United Needs YouOver the past year, MOBB United was busy at work advocating for the protection of our sons. We made our national debut at the Essence Festival in New Orleans this Summer and with the OWN Network on a show called “Checked Inn” ... |
MOBB United OnlineMoms of Black Boys (MOBB) United, Inc. and MOBB United for Social Change, Inc. (MUSC) are sister organizations that are dedicated to positively influencing how Black boys and men are ... |
Ed and Eng Committee Update: Black Minds Matter courseHappy December, beautiful MOBB United Moms! We have had a busy year. One of the goals of the organization is to provide critical support to Moms and further their ability to advocate on behalf of their sons. The Education and Engagement Committee has several projects we have been working on to stay true to the MOBB United mission ... |
Policy and Advocacy Committee ProgressThe MOBB United for Social Change, Inc. (MUSC) Policy and Advocacy Committee sets the strategic policy priorities and drives advocacy initiatives for the organization. As a committee, we set and lead execution of MUSC’s policy agenda, research policies that impact Black men and boys, identify opportunities to advocate on ... |
Black Sons AbroadHow many travel writers under the age of 10 years old do you know? None? Well, I'm excited to introduce you to 9-year-old Jace and his little brother, 8-year-old Merl. They are authors, travelers, and young Black princes making their way across the miles and making their ... |
Black Sons in Military ServiceJames Weldon Johnson said: "We have come over a way that with tears has been watered, We have come, treading our path through the blood of the slaughtered, Out from the gloomy past, Here now we stand at last, Where the white gleam of our ... |
Gifted Sons -
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If You Build It,
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Special Needs Committee OverviewThe ability to experience profound worry is almost a prerequisite for motherhood. When you’re the mother of a Black boy born into this American society, that worry increases exponentially ... |
Chapter Development OverviewChapter Development began just a few days after the Moms of Black Boys United, Inc. group was formed on Facebook. With a vast number of moms joining the private group and wanting to connect, we began to create state files so that moms in the same area could connect locally. This was an awesome idea, as many members began ... |
Moms Reaching across the Race Aisle: True SisterhoodMy first Cabbage Patch doll was a little boy with dark, chocolate skin, and the first boy I kissed was a sweet, nerdy Black kid. My folks were both in education, voted Democrat, and believed that their actions spoke louder than words. I was the blue-eyed ... |
Strategic Financial Partnerships: Banking and Buying BlackIn 2011, I moved my money out of a big bank and into a small credit union, one that serves the community of color in which I work. I did this on Bank Transfer Day, launched that November 5th by a woman in California who was ired by newly imposed ATM fees. Bank Transfer Day coincided ... |
Facebook Repost: Lynda Jones on Incarcerated SonsPublisher's Note: Usually, what is discussed in the Moms of Black Boys United private Facebook group remains confidential. Once in awhile though, we get permission from members to repost entries of notable impact. Check out this one by mom Lynda Jones ... |
MOBB United PoetryThe Legacy of America"Red, white, and blue, yes, you! |
MOBB UNITED NEEDS YOU: Become a Volunteer Today! Volunteer Shout Out
This lady right here! Natasha Marie has hit the ground running with MOBB United for Social Change, Inc. (MUSC) and Moms of Black Boys United, Inc. She volunteered to write for the newsletter and has so far turned out some excellent pieces: “Young, Black and Incarcerated” and “Hopes and Dreams while Serving Time”, both of which give a powerful voice to moms of incarcerated sons. Check out her latest...
She says, "Being a volunteer with MOBB United has literally been a Godsend! My prayer has been to connect with other women who are of like-minded faith. Finding other women who are mothers (particularly of Black boys) has been an added bonus to my prayers..." |
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*Special thanks to C.K. LeDaniel, Rebecca Palermo, and Vivian Nwankpah, Beth Lunde, and Theresa Cunningham, for their contributions in the preparation of the newsletter.* Prior Editions - Oct 2017, Sept 2017, Aug 2017, June 2017 |
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Edition 4 October 2017 | ||
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SPECIAL FEATURE |
Perhaps it was a moment of deja vu as the nation watched another hurricane form in the Atlantic after Hurricane Harvey had already devastated Texas just a couple of weeks before. This time, it was Irma who threatened the Caribbean and the state of Florida as... |
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*Special thanks to C.K. LeDaniel, Teri Harris and Vivian Nwankpah> for their contributions in the preparation of the newsletter.* |
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Story Ideas? Submit them to [email protected]! | ||||||